Unlike previously, this collection has no central theme.They are, however, backed by some hardcore opinion-giving so that's OK. As always, please share with me details of what pisses you off and I will adjudicate on the merits or no of your justification.
Even numbers.
Why? Odd isn't it. (Sorry, couln't resist. Cheesy I know.) To me they seem a little too goody goody and a bit smug with it. The number 2 especially gets my goat.
White ford escorts
They're so tacky though aren't they? Snobbish? Most certainly. Am trying unsuccessfully to purge snobbery from my veins at the moment but am finding it trying.
The trees and shubbery planted by the council along motorways and dual carriageways
Sorry, but they are piss poor excuses for arboriage. What kind of environmental heritage are we leaving here. It's the natural equivalent of the 70s architectural legacy to towns and cities. Has the council ever heard of oak? Mountain ash? Sycamore? Christ almighty. I am almost tempted to go chuck some bloody decent seeds around myself.
Big watches
They are simply unecessary and it's presumably meant to be impressive. Especially if you're a bloke. It's a bit predictably phallic in it's intention isn't it? Come on now.....let's have a bit of restrained taste.
People who warble and harmonise when singing along to a song.
This one applies to females only. It makes me cringe with embarrassment and sometimes. If the girl is especially putting in Maria Carey-like warbles, my head
actually spins with embarrassment. Literally, I get head spin. Please stop it. Save my balance. Sing like a normal person for god's sake.
Religious people
It's the self-certainty here that offends.
Pot, kettle, black? Do I give a...? Nothing wrong with a touch of inconsistency every now again....
Ready washed and shredded bags of iceberg lettuce
Especially if it's from Marks and Spencers. You are just compounding utter laziness with complete disregard for monetary value.
People who eat Ryvita and claim they like it
It's just bare-faced lying is all it is. Who are you trying to kidd?
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3 comments:
Should any vegetable be bagged up in plastic?
And where do you stand on bottled water?
What valid questions Ben.
No, vegetables should never come in plastic bags. it makes the vegetables sweat and sweating is unseemly and does not promote longevity.
Bottle water? This one is complex.
If you live in London, I understand that tap water is not palatable. This does not mean you should buy bottles of Evian. Bottled water is objectionable as it harms the evironment through the rape of the earth, adding to landfill and greenhouses gases upon transportation. if you live in London the only acceptable move is the use of a Britta water filter or some such other filtering machanism.
If you live somewhere live ribchester, it would be unpatriotic (to tyour village) to do anything other than drink the local waters. Why would you wish to any way?
If you are going out on a hot day, you should think ahead and use a plastic bottle that is hanging around you house and fill it with water so as not to add to the mountains of plastic purchased and thrown-away on a daily basis.
In extreme cases, if you are at risk of dying of dehydration and have been caught out waterless, you can purchase bottled water. This should be as 'local' as possible. Certianly nothing from a foreign country that has clogged the air with petrol emissions to reach you.
If all this information is confusing, I would write it down on the back of a (used) envelope and slip it in your purse/wallet for future reference.
Quite right. I imagine, most shopper-autobots would be surprised to realise, should they wake themselves from their stupor and look past the supermarket propaganda, that a great many fruits and vegetables actually come in a packaging of their own, which has been perfectly adequate for time immemorial preceding today. I believe the correct layman's term is 'skin'.
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